Setting realistic expectations during the recovery process–and accepting what that reality means for recovery–particularly early recovery–can be a challenging and humbling experience. Many of us in recovery/recovered (interchangeable for me) were very used to setting or having set high expectations in our lives prior to recovery–and they were realistic in the sense that it was normal to expect to be above the crowd who thought that being average or just doing your best was acceptable.…

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 I cannot tell you how many times throughout my life—especially during the seventeen years I struggled with bulimia—I said the phrase, I feel fat. I could be having a perfectly pleasant day, only to suddenly find myself drowning in negative body image. Sometimes the trigger was situational, like putting on a pair of jeans that just came out of the dryer, feeling overly full after a meal, or catching a glimpse of myself in a…

Read More I Feel Fat… HOW to Feel Better in Your Body!

Why is it so much easier for one to internalize messages from society than to realize that one is good enough? Body hatred seems to be the go-to coping mechanism to distract many from their "truths" about who they think they are. Of course, there is a mutlitude of underlying issues as we all know–I am not going to go into all of that in this post. I've just been thinking a lot about the…

Read More Loving Our Bodies, Loving Ourselves…

Just wanted to let the ED community know that I will be speaking about eating disorders on HLN's Showbiz Tonight with host A.J. Hammer. It airs at 11:00pm EST!    

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Hi Everyone, Just wanted to let you know that my memoir, Something Spectacular, is being released online tomorrow! It will be in stores the first week of June  

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So often I hear patients in early recovery questioning whether it is really working because they don't feel better already. They share their discouragement about how they are working really hard and discuss just how hard it is to not engage in their eating disorder. The first thing I usually ask is how long have they been working on their recovery versus the length of time being in the eating disorder. The answer is usually…

Read More Patience and Perseverance is Key!

An important concept the patients learn at Renfrew is Urge Surfing. That is, you ride the wave of the urge to use ED symptoms until it passes. For so many years, I couldn't see that there was a psychological surfboard on which I could ride the crashing waves of my urges and cravings. I would have a thought to binge or purge and it would automatically send me into the action. As if I didn't…

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     At least two times a week, my clients will inquire about whether an eating disorder is a disease, like in alcoholism, or if this is a disorder one can fully recover from and never have to think about again. Looking into their eyes, eyes that reflect a desperate desire to know that they can fully recover, I want to tell all of them that full recovery is possible for everyone. However, that is…

Read More Dis-Ease or Disease?